Category Archives: Doubting Your Vision?

Does Your Dream Need A “Do-Over”?

            Do-over-button Have you ever had days when the “same ol’, same ol’” feels like it’s just sucking the life right out of you? Have you ever felt like you’ve “missed it” somehow – destroyed the destiny you might’ve had by making a wrong choice, a huge error, or even just wasting time? 

            Have you ever looked up to the sky and asked, “Why am I even here?”

            We’ve all been there. But the fact is, it’s never too late to discover your destiny or to make course corrections and get back on track to it.  How?  Because our God is a God of “do-overs”!

            Look at Moses who got a do-over after killing a man (his fault).  Look at Joseph who got a do-over after spending 22 years in prison (not his fault).  Whether you’re ten or eighty, God has a destiny for you.  And it’s a good destiny – one that will give your years life and your life purpose.  It will get you out of bed and excited to get moving every morning.  And it will allow you to know that you’re making a real difference in the world which, essentially, adds up to “eternal purpose”.

            I’m reminded of a young woman who had moved to a new town and had no job or money or husband (he’d died); all she had was an old woman to take care of and no food to feed her.

            Eventually, the woman got a job harvesting in the fields, barely making any money, and really just living off of what she was able to pick from the fields and take home.  And she did this day in and day out, day in and day out, day in and . . . you get the idea; you’ve been there.

            By now, you realize I mean Ruth.  But did you ever wonder what she was thinking during those long, hot hours in the fields?

            How did I get here? Did I make the wrong choice?  What will happen if I can’t work anymore?  Why won’t anyone talk to me?  Where would I be if I’d stayed in Moab?  Will I die here . . . ?

            Long story short: Ruth had no idea that she had an incredible destiny, that someday she’d marry a rich man and eventually be counted as the great-great grandmother of King David!  Nor did Joseph, rotting away in prison, ever dream that he’d be in charge of all of Egypt.  Nor did Moses, a murderer and fugitive, in his wildest dreams, ever imagine that one day he’d be the deliverer of the entire nation of Israel.

            It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, didn’t do or tried to do and failed – God has a plan for your life, a purpose, a destiny – and it’s a good one.  And only you can fulfill it.  No one else in all the earth has the combination of talent, ability, mindset, personality and life experience that you have. You, and only you, can fulfill the purpose for which God planted you on this planet.

            Think about that.

When the Dream Is Not Behaving

Broken Success Glass           Did you ever have a dream come true – but not the way you thought? It didn’t happen the way you thought it would happen, it didn’t look the way you thought it would look, and it didn’t turn out the way you thought it would turn out. But still, your dream came true . . .

            Or did it?

            When I began teaching 17 years ago, it was after I’d been out of school for many years and teaching didn’t look at all like I thought it would look. Not that God hadn’t called me to it; He most clearly had in ways that were undeniable. But teaching looked and felt so different than what I had expected that many times I would’ve quit – had God not made His call so clear.

            But still, when I began teaching high school English and found that 10th and 11th grade students couldn’t tell a noun from a verb from an adjective – nor did they care to – I was upset. But, I thought, just hold on till next year. It’ll be better then. But it wasn’t. By the third year of “I don’t know, don’t care, and don’t care to know,” I had a moment of truth: it was always going to be this way.

           Livin’ the dream.

           Of course (some would argue), if a teacher is a good one, she’ll make kids want to learn. However, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him write an essay. (Or something like that.)  Nevertheless, they might be right. Back in the day when I was in school, teachers made us want to work. I think their paddles might have had something to do with that.

            Today I guess I’m reflecting on all of this because four things happened last week to make the point. Not, unfortunately, that last week was all that unusual.

            Monday I noticed a student crying. She wouldn’t say why but another student told me that there’d been a suicide in her (extended) family. What do you say to that? I told her how sorry I was and tried to coax her to talk to me, to somebody, but she wouldn’t. I didn’t ask her to do any work but I had to wonder why she’d come to school. Maybe it was just better than being at home . . .

          Tuesday I went to a house to tutor a student who, by the way, doesn’t do any work. And he’ll tell you that. He told me that – twelve times. And he’s been not working for several months while being home-tutored, but next year he’ll be in the next grade anyway. Why? Because in this country, we have this wonderful thing called “social promotion” (which I could write a whole post on); this means that students are promoted through school based on age and facial hair – no lie – and not on mastery of skills. Of course, mastery is such a ridiculously archaic idea. Ever wonder why the United States ranks behind a hundred other countries in education? That’s why.

           Wednesday I had a kid arguing and yelling that he would most certainly not put his cell phone on my desk, and when I suggested he then go to the office and explain it to them, he declined that offer, too – only louder – in case I didn’t hear him the first time. Of course, I insisted (how mean of me) but still, he didn’t see my point of view. And from there it went. Eventually, he left but informed me on the way out the door that he would not, despite my recommendation, leave his phone in his locker next time.

           Sigh.

           Thursday, a girl in study hall had a major meltdown because another teacher had given her a lower grade on a project than she thought she deserved. There was much yelling and the throwing of books and threats of bodily harm to the teacher. Attempts on my part to do negotiations failed miserably. Oh, well. She’ll probably end up with the completely effective deterrent of home-bound tutoring where she’ll be forced to sleep in and play video games all day except for the two hours she’d be rudely interrupted to be tutored one-on-one. So sad.

           Why am I venting like this? To make a point: there will be days when “the dream” is just not behaving itself. There will be disappointments, perhaps tears, maybe even a failure here and there. You might even hear yourself saying some version of, “Why did I ever want to do this???”  But then, right when you’re ready to get the eraser and re-write the dream, you feel a little nudge and hear a quiet whisper, “You know why . . .”

            And you do.

 

 

Fear Not. Dream.

If Your Dreams Don't Scare You . . .    

      Recently, I had a conversation with some friends and we discussed our dreams: What were the things that we hoped and dreamed we’d accomplish some day?  What did we really believe we were called to do? What were our secret hearts’ desires?

     As we chatted, it became clear that every one of us- and there were about a dozen – had a dream.  And they varied.  Some were as big as to start a company which would assist churches in starting their own businesses in order to become financially independent to another who wanted to produce a worship and CD to another whose heart’s desire was to become a wife and mother. Others included a woman who dreamed of building a house that could be used as a retreat center for others and a man who wanted to return to school and become a minister. My dream? To write thriller-type novels with spiritual warfare and political themes.

     Despite our dreams, however, there was one common thread – well, two, actually: doubt and fear.

     Now we all know that we’re not supposed to have any of that.  And sometimes we talk a good game.  But the fact of the matter is that doubt and fear come in all shapes and sizes:  “What if I can’t get the education I need to become __________ ?” (Fill in the blank.)  “What if people laugh when I try to  ___________?”  “What if I don’t have the money I need to accomplish ___________?”  “What if I’m not good enough, smart enough, attractive enough, influential enough, talented enough????”  What if?  WHAT IF??  WHAAAAAT IFFFFFF????

     “What if I try – and fail . . . ?” Continue reading Fear Not. Dream.