I once saw a cartoon of a skeleton woman wearing a dress and high heels; she was seated next to a sign saying “Waiting for Mr. Right”. Evidently, she’d been waiting a long time and Mr. R. never showed.
Or did he?
Was she so preoccupied with finding Mr. Perfect that she missed Mr. Right?
What if things or people or situations don’t come packaged the way we think they should? Would Beauty have missed the beauty in the Beast? Would Prince Charming have passed on the cinder girl?
Would Mr. Darcy have bucked the social hierarchy to marry Elizabeth?
What about situations other than marriage? What if our kids aren’t the children featured in the Hallmark movies? Have you ever looked up to the sky and said, “God, whatever made You think that I’m equipped to handle this child? I’m just not that good.” Or maybe you’ve said, “Why can’t I have parents like he has?”
Sometimes we have to mine deep inside of a person to find the diamond. But before we start feeling too put out by having to do all the work, let’s remember that we, too, are jewels-in-the-rough and that if we sparkle at all, it’s because someone’s been willing to put the time and energy into drilling through our rock-hard places.
So – what about the neighbor, the roommate, the employee, the co-worker, the student – even the boss or pastor who’s not perfect? Ditch them and find one who is? (Good luck with that.) What about the situation or opportunity or job that’s not perfect? Keep walking?
I’ve known a fair number of people over the years who’ve passed on a job offer because it wasn’t the perfect job – it didn’t have the work load or salary or hours or perks that they thought they deserved. In their views, starting at the bottom – or even the middle – just wouldn’t do. Give them the top job with a big salary and lots of autonomy – or give them nothing. They would wait until someone came along who really appreciated their value and was willing to give them what they believed they were due.
Some of them are still waiting.
Perhaps it’s not the perfect job for your qualifications and experience. Ask yourself: can it be? Given some hard work and time, does it have potential for growth, development, advancement, promotion? If not, can it be the stepping stone for the experience needed to reach that riper plum?
“Perfection,” per se, is not always perfectly packaged.
“Don’t judge a book by its cover” is a classic for a reason: we’ve all been tempted to do it. Haven’t we all been attracted to that thing sporting lots of shiny tinsel and frosting only to find that what was inside the package fell far short of the promised hype? And I don’t mean book covers only.
If we check any antique store or yard sale or even grandma’s attic and dig around in the corners, behind the tables, and underneath the cobwebs, we’re bound to find some precious treasure – priceless even. It may have to be dusted off and it might even need to new part or two, but it’s the real thing; it’s the forgotten diamond just waiting to be mined.
We need to be willing to search places no one else is willing to search. We need to ignore outward appearances and be willing to dig down to the heart of a matter, a person, a situation, a seeming opportunity. We can’t simply wait until perfection finds us because – it won’t.
Jewels don’t just mine themselves – whether in people or situations. The gold, the diamonds, the emeralds, the pearls – they’ll be forever buried.
Except for you.